Always 21

A little girl goes to the barber shop with her father. She stands next to the barber chair, while her dad gets his hair cut, eating a snack cake. The barber says to her, "Sweetheart, you're gonna get hair on your Twinkie." She says, "Yes, I know, and I'm gonna get boobs, too."

The most shocking things in life always happen when you are doing something, like standing in the kitchen cutting strawberries. So, there I am, and 1st Daughter casually asks me when she should have sex. Keep in mind #1 daughter is 9 YEARS OLD!!! I am prepared for many technical questions about womanhood, but I had not given much thought as to when I would advise(?) my 9 year old daughter to have sex. I flummoxed my way through some kind of answer that clearly told her to wait a long, long, long time.

I was talking with some other moms about this last night over dinner. The mom of a 15 year old, who clearly had been asked all the questions, gave this advice, “Be it sex or drugs or whatever, the right answer is always 21 years old. 21 is always the right answer.” I was amazed that she could so quickly solve this dilemma and chalk everything up to being ready for action at 21.

I’ve been thinking about 21–and I like this answer a lot. I could absolutely tell my daughter about the first time I had an alcoholic drink (don’t laugh here, 21) or the first time I tried some kind of non-prescription, possibly illegal drug (don’t laugh harder, 37) or the first time I smoked (really, really don’t laugh, never), but sex? That happened much younger and maybe I should have waited for 21 to do that–I think I would of made smarter decisions about who, where, when and perhaps enjoyed it more.

I am terrible at lying. Years ago, I was a great lier. I could make up anything and have anyone believing it in a second–I had a great imagination and came up with some doozies. Now, I sincerely suck at it. If my daughter looks me in the eye, I’m afraid I am going to spill the beans. But sex is scarier now, considering AIDs and all the STDs out there. It’s so much riskier and it’s not so much about pregnancy, it’s about taking your health in you hands.

My biggest fears growing up about sex were pregnancy and a broken heart. Now it’s those issues plus the most important–life.

My BIG favorite South Park answer??? “There’s a time and place for everything–and it’s called college. ” Check out the episode Ike’s Wee Wee and you will get a better education on why drugs are bad AND circumcision.

Maybe I can say, “There is a time and place for everything.It’s called when you’re in college and 21.”